Making Things Right
One thing we expect at BMSA is mistakes. We all make mistakes as we learn to interact and find our place and how to function in this world. We aim for a culture of ownership and mindful reflection of how our actions affect others. We practice asking the 5 restorative questions to guide students in resolving conflict. We find that when students sincerely reflect on these 5 questions, the learn about themselves & others, as well as feel empowered to know that they can make things right when they've made a mistake.
5 Restorative Questions
- What happened. (We recognize that everyone has unique perspectives, so we seek to understand each person's experience of what happened.)
- What were you thinking and feeling at the time? (By using our listening & empathy tools, we learn about the needs and motivations of others.)
- What have you thought about since then?
- Who was affected by your actions and how?
- What can be done to make things right? (We try to go beyond, "I won't do it again," and think about how to restore what has been broken.)
Below is a document we use to help students reflect on actions that have cause problems. You'll see that it guides them to think through what tools they can use next time to meet their needs. You can learn more about the TOOLBOX Tools here.